Lately in the Bible study that I attend, we have been going through the book of Mark. I have read bits and pieces of Mark before, but I had never read it all the way through, so I am learning A LOT during this Bible study, and I just wanted to share some of that with y'all :)
One of the main realizations that I am making as we are going through Mark is how much we are like the disciples. I know that I have referred to myself as a "disciple of Christ" and I have seen and heard so many other people refer to themselves in the same way, but what does that really mean?
"Passing alongside the Sea of Galilee, He [Jesus] saw Simon and Andrew the brother of Simon casting a net into the sea, for they were fishermen. And Jesus said to them. “Follow Me, and I will make you become fishers of men.” And immediately they left their nets and followed Him. And going on a little farther, He saw James the son of Zebedee and John his brother, who were in their boat mending the nets. And immediately He called them, and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired servants and followed him." -Mark 1:16-20
We read passages like these about how the disciples just dropped everything they were doing at once in order to respond to Jesus' call and follow Him to become His disciples, and we (or at least I know I do) think about how awesome that is. It must have taken some spectacular people to be disciples of Christ, to let go of their entire lives to follow Jesus without question, right? Ehh, not exactly.
The disciples did indeed follow Jesus without hesitation which is truly remarkable, but that's not all the disciples did. The disciples also doubted, they got scared, they forgot who Jesus was. In the exact same way that we do.
"And a great windstorm arose, and the waves were breaking into the boat, so that the boat was already filling. But He [Jesus] was in the stern, asleep on the cushion. And they woke Him and said to Him, “Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?” And He awoke and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, “Peace! Be still!”And the wind ceased, and there was a great calm. He said to them, “Why are you so afraid? Have you still no faith?” And they were filled with great fear and said to one another, “Who then is this, that even the wind and the sea obey him?” - Mark 4:37-41
This is one of my favorite passages because the first time I really looked into what was happening here, it was during a time in my life when I felt like my life was the boat in the midst of the crashing waves and I felt myself freaking out, like Jesus what is going on here!? As I looked at this story, I saw that I could either act like Jesus or act like the disciples, and as much as I wanted to be like Oh of course I trust that God is going to calm the storm and I can just "sleep" peacefully with no worries, I didn't. I was acting just like the disciples. I was freaking out.
Every time I read this story I get slightly irritated with the disciples. Like, Y'all are in a boat with Jesus, and y'all are afraid? WHAT? That doesn't even make sense. And then God has to stop me. You are living your life for Me and I am on your side, yet you are afraid? Now THAT doesn't make sense. We see it back then and we see it today; Christ's disciples aren't perfect, we're human.
Another story in Mark that I absolutely love (and again, see so much of us in the disciples) is the story of Jesus and His disciples feeding the 5,000 with five loaves of bread and two fish (Mark 6:30-44). As I read this story, I first find it interesting how the disciples were looking out for the best interest of the people (or so they thought) when they told Jesus to let the people go and buy themselves something to eat because it was getting late and they were in a desolate place. But Jesus' response is what really caught my attention. "You give them something to eat." And when the disciples thought He meant for them to go spend money on food for them, Jesus clarified by telling them to use the food they already had to feed the crowd.
How many times do we think we are doing someone a favor by telling them how to get something, or helping them get something, when God is actually saying "You have what they need, why don't you give it to them?" How many times are we like the disciples, looking for ways around giving up what it is that we have in order to help someone? Now I'm not saying that we need to just give give give to people without allowing them to understand the importance of learning how to do certain things on their own, but what I am saying is that if God is telling you to give something to someone, then do it without holding back.
"But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him?" -1 John 3:17
"Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it. Do not say to your neighbor, "Go, and come again, tomorrow I will give it"–when you have it with you." -Proverbs 3:27-28
Even if you think you only have a little, give them that little bit. Because the disciples listened to Jesus, they were able to use five loaves of bread and two fish to feed 5,000 people and still have food left over. God can do more with the little bit that you give away than you can with the little bit that you keep.
"But when they saw Him [Jesus] walking on the sea they thought it was a ghost, and cried out, for they all saw Him and were terrified. But immediately He spoke to them and said, “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid.” -Mark 6:49-50
In this passage we see the disciples being afraid yet again. And I don't think it's coincidence that they were in a boat when this happened, just like they were when they were afraid in chapter 4. Except this time, instead of them being afraid of the storm, they were afraid of Jesus. Why? Because they didn't recognize Him. It baffles me that they didn't recognize someone that they spent so much of their time with, but they didn't. But again, that's how we can be.
Just like the disciples didn't expect Jesus to be walking on the water, they automatically thought it was a ghost, sometimes we don't expect God to do something in our lives that we aren't used to, so we automatically assume it's not God. But then just like Jesus had to tell the disciples to take heart because it was Him, God also has to tell us to take heart for the same exact reason. We can't expect to understand everything that God is doing, but just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it's not God.
"Now they [the disciples] had forgotten to bring bread, and they had only one loaf with them in the boat. And He [Jesus] cautioned them, saying, “Watch out; beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and the leaven of Herod.” And they began discussing with one another the fact that they had no bread. And Jesus, aware of this, said to them, “Why are you discussing the fact that you have no bread? Do you not yet perceive or understand? Are your hearts hardened? Having eyes do you not see, and having ears do you not hear? And do you not remember? When I broke the five loaves for the five thousand, how many baskets full of broken pieces did you take up?” They said to Him, “Twelve.” “And the seven for the four thousand, how many baskets full of broken pieces did you take up?” And they said to Him, “Seven.” And He said to them, “Do you not yet understand?” -Mark 8:16-21
Before this passage, the disciples left the scene of the feeding of the four thousand (Mark 8:1-10), the Pharisees proceeded to question Jesus, and Jesus left the Pharisees to go get in the boat with the disciples which is when this conversation took place. We see that while Jesus is warning the disciples about the Pharisees, the disciples are more preoccupied with the fact that they only have one loaf of bread with them in the boat. Two things stood out to me about the way the disciples are acting here that reminded me so much of my own life.
First, while Jesus is trying to make a very important point to disciples, they aren't paying Him any attention. There have been so many times when this is me. When I am so caught up in something going on in my life that I am completely missing what God is trying to show me or tell me. I find this happening the most often when I'm focused on myself and what I want, that I miss what God is trying to do through me for someone else.
And second, they don't think one loaf is enough. Although they had literally just seen Jesus feed thousands of people with a handful of loaves of bread, not once but twice, as soon as they get into the boat their first thought is "We forgot the bread!" Then they go on to talk about how they have no bread, even though the first verse in this passage stated that they had one loaf. They're so worried about not having enough bread that they forgot who they were with! Jesus. The saaaame person who they witnessed perform a miracle in order to feed so many people. But here they seemed to have forgotten about that because they were more focused on their circumstances than on the One who could change them.
Jesus is saying haven't you seen what I JUST did?? When will you get it? When will you understand? When will you stop doubting me? Yet the disciples don't remember. They doubt Him because they have forgotten, so Jesus has to remind them, the same way that He so often has to remind us that if He did it before, He can do it again.
These are only a couple of examples that show how the disciples were just like we are. I'm sure you could read through the book of Mark and pick up on stuff that I missed, and read through the other Gospels and find even more about them, but I just love this because so often people talk about how the disciples were human like us with ordinary jobs (fishermen, tax collectors, etc.) who picked up their crosses and followed Jesus. But they fail to mention that even after they began to follow Jesus, they were still just like us. Maybe not entirely, but we sure do have a lot in common.
This shows us that it is okay to mess up. We are human. It happens. And it will continue to happen. Just like the disciples doubted Jesus as they walked and talked with Him, so we will too doubt Jesus. Just like the disciples forgot who Jesus was and what He could do even though they saw Him perform miracle after miracle, so we too may forget who Jesus is and what He can do in the midst of our problems. Just like the disciples didn't understand some of the things Jesus said and did, so we too will often not understand what Jesus is saying or doing. But one thing the disciples didn't do is give up. They didn't stop following Jesus (Except Judas of course). Even Peter denied Jesus, but afterwards he made it his goal to never stop following him.
We weren't made to be perfect. We were made to glorify God. When people can see how weak and imperfect we are, yet that God is still able to use us, that brings Him the most glory.
We do right, but we also fall, mess up, and get ourselves in trouble. But at the end of the day, He loves us and forgives us, and we are still His. We are His disciples.
Be blessed♡
-Elisha :)